Have you outgrown your current self? Have you evolved past the version of yourself that you currently are? Are your changing beliefs changing you faster than you thought?
Well, today marks the first day of the rest of your beautiful life.
I say that because that’s what happened to me on November 4th, 2022…around 7 pm🕗
I was sitting in a room, in what was the worst period of my life. I had no one, to me, I had nothing and had lost it all, failure looked at me and laughed. I had given the world my hope and it slapped me back in the face with it. I had given up on life and living and then, I got angry…the type of visceral anger that feels like you are shouting at yourself. Screaming “What the fuck is wrong with you!?”
That day became the turning point in my life.
So if a voice is yelling at you in your head as well, then like I said, welcome to the first day of the rest of your beautiful life.
Because one day, one day, it happens, and you will just be tired…
Nobody will have to tell you, you will be sitting in the wreckage of wasted potential, lost time and missed opportunities. Scenes will replay in your head at lightning speed. The anger will fuel inner arguments and you will find yourself talking back to the hurt, pain and trauma because frankly, you are tired of them singing the same sad songs in your ear.
That day is the day everything changes for you.
💭I also noticed this common path with many successful people. They had almost the same formula:
They hit rock bottom, which causes an inner breakthrough and they are forced to have an honest dialogue with themselves and confront their inner demons; then this honest dialogue ignites self-disgust, sparking a burning hunger and desire for change. That then gives them an “I MUST!” energy that births hope in them, finally turning all that into action that springs forth micro improvements that lead to breakthroughs.
They had to break through their breakdowns to have a breakthrough.
It’s such a painful experience, I know. But you cannot be common and cutting edge at the same time. You can be mediocre, or you can be great.
Mediocre individuals dance between the lines. They know their lives need to change, and they know they need to do something about it, but they have not yet found this transformative spark and so, they remain trapped in their own waste, okay with living in their ruins, unwilling to take action and do something about it.
Imagine the towers of a new life that could have been built….😔
Self-unbranding (I just make up words at this point, lol!) is the day the formula starts for you and that angry, visceral voice starts to speak in your head. You will look at your life and start stripping away the layers until you confront your soul's nakedness. It's a terrifying process, but the pain, shame, hurt and anger you find will ignite a powerful fire within you. This is the moment you realize your inner strength and potential.
It’s the moment you realise you became what you needed to be to survive, but that is not who you are, you will realise you needed nothing or no one all this time to get you started, it was always inside of you to take you where your wildest dreams are. To become who you always saw yourself being. Something super-natural.
Cry, wail, scream…then you will tap yourself and say “Now, let us start”. Because you have found faith in yourself.
Not many people are brave enough to go on that journey.
And what they do not tell you is how isolating the road becomes after you take the first step.
Because with this newfound strength and belief in yourself, what you are going to find is that at the end of the day the faith of who you are meant to become lives only inside of you. The validation has to be in your own conviction and nothing else. And if it is, that is when you will find courage.
🔥 You’ll summon the courage to perform miracles that your old self couldn’t even fathom
🔥 Courage to attempt to try to do new things and follow new paths
🔥 Courage to summon the power to go on
🔥 The courage to build a new life!
This quote from the book, The Alchemist, after he had gone through that journey to find his treasure always rings deep with me:
The boy reached through to the Soul of the World and saw that it was a part of the Soul of God. And he saw that the Soul of God was his own soul. And that he, a boy, could perform miracles.”
That effort, that power, that greatness and the ability to become and transform is already inside of you. All you need to do is ignite that fire, tear into your soul, and turn the switch on!
Find the frustration, anger, revenge, spite, lack, shame, grief, disgust, or fear… I don’t know what you have to do, but turn that shit on.
Don't be like those who live in the burden of their comfort zone. It is a sad place to be. Never outgrowing their old normal, becoming what they have let themselves get used to. Never changing levels…
Decide you are going to change levels! You need to outgrow the things of life instead of waiting for life to happen. I want you to grow faster than life.
The minute you decide to change your life, it is already different. The presence of the desire is the sign that something in your mind and heart has already shifted and something in you has changed. The hardest part has been done...Now it's all about getting who you are to reflect the nature of the new inner you that has been born.
That is becoming.
✨So let me offer you this letter as another sign✨
My darling, your breakthrough arrives in the guise of a breakdown. It's a moment of reckoning where you experience a reality so misaligned with what you feel inside that you are forced to confront your true potential. This is the first instance in which you recognise that you are more than what your circumstances would indicate, that you are more than what your past has proven you to be, that you are more than what you’re currently feeling, that you are more than what other people think you are, that you are more than what you can even maybe fully imagine yourself to be, but you sense it.
It is such a pivotal experience for you and a turning point in your story. This sense that you are meant for and capable of and going to be more than you can imagine…and it exists almost entirely on the basis of your own faith. And that faith in yourself is the cornerstone of that transformation. It is probably the only thing that will be able to bring it most completely into form.
You won't wake up one day and discover your life is different. No...one day you will wake up, and realize you have outgrown your old normal. You will realize that you are standing in the ruins of your life and you have a choice...you can continue living there, diminishing your capacity, wasting your time picking the ruins apart trying to understand them; or you can just let go and get to work building the new city you can become.
Becoming the person you envision requires courage, persistence, and self-discovery. You'll face setbacks, doubts, and self-criticism. But don't let these obstacles derail your journey.
Remember, builders don't always get things right.
You will read, and you will seek advice, sometimes you will do everything right and yet the outcome you imagined will not so effortlessly arrive, you will overthink, you will second-guess everything, especially yourself and you will ask yourself the same questions over and over again. You might spiral, you might give up sometimes, you'll remember your regrets and retrace your steps and you will look outside yourself trying to find evidence that maybe you are the person you hope to be. But don't be like most people and lose your momentum or your drive. Don't revert back to the familiar, back to what you've always known and what has always worked.
The crazy thing is if you do go back, you won't be comfortable there anymore because you would have outgrown that life so much so that you can no longer engage with it the way you once did. You can no longer engage with what you know you do not want, and this is a gift.
Choose to grow, to evolve, to become the person you're meant to be. The path may be difficult, but the rewards are immeasurable.
I will always wish you well 🧡🧡🧡
Such a beautiful read.
This resonates deeply with anyone who’s experienced that pivotal moment of hitting rock bottom and deciding to transform. I appreciate how raw and authentic you’ve been in describing the journey from despair to self-rebirth. It’s empowering to recognize that the breakdown can serve as a breakthrough—that the pain, frustration, and anger can become fuel for personal growth. The idea of outgrowing your current self, embracing discomfort, and rebuilding the “new city” of your life is such a powerful image. It’s a call to action, a reminder to me that transformation is a choice that begins with a single decision. Thank you for sharing this inspiring message.
I am currently at a phase or season in my life where I want to grow, I want to do more, create impacts in lives.. In every way possible, through writing as well.
This is really a guide, or will I say, a motivation for me.
Thank you Miss Tutu Adetunmbi.
And by the way, I love your name, Tutu. 😇